I still think of sheryl crow when I hear about our escrow

In the past four weeks me and the miso bought a house, lost our cat to cancer, and traveled back to the east coast all but one weekend. I am exhausted. Physically, mentally, spiritually - you name it, it's tired. My current fantasies involve a hotel with robes and an ocean and a patio. I get to hide away for a week and when I emerge everything has been packed and moved, unwanted furniture has been sold, the wedding is planned, the dress fits like a glove, and that tightness in my chest when I think about Finn has finally loosened. When I'm feeling really gluttonous, I add graded final exams and a tan.

All that has happened in the past month has, at the very least, made tonight all the better: this is the third night in a row that the miso and I have cooked a healthy dinner, done dishes together, and settled down for the evening with a cup of tea to do our own research. The fact that I currently do not have any pending itineraries is heaven.

The other upside of all this insanity is that the miso has been there and I've gotten to see him in crisis mode and major life event mode and dancing mode and I'll be the strong one here mode. Not to get too mushy here, folks, but that boy rocks my world and is my rock. And it's been amazing to know before we get all married and stuff that he really is that stand-up guy I thought he was in any and every situation.

With this past month behind us, I now have everything that needs to be done in our remaining two months on the west coast. And I will readily confess to being a total wimp about it all. When my parents dropped me off at the airport last Saturday (after the best wedding of the best friend a girl could have) and gave me the ol' "see you at your wedding in August cuz we're moving to China in a couple weeks," I straight up lost it. They pulled away, I gave the skycap a wad of ones, and my face exploded. I felt like I was boarding a plane to go back to more than I could handle. It was like every aspect of my life decided to come into the ring at once and I couldn't tap out. And it's all good stuff - amazing stuff. My first house with my first (and last) husband, my wedding, even my research paper that I get to deliver in Venice. These are all good things and I'm not moaning about them. I just kinda wish these major life events had been doled out a little more evenly.

For now I'm taking it a day at a time. I'm just going to enjoy my tea and draft some emails and think about my new home (okay, it's technically the mortgage lender's new home, but in thirty years, baby, that two bedroom is ALL ours) and a name for Henry's new best bud who will keep him company on those cold Cambridge nights.